Sunday, November 11, 2007

If wishes were horses!

She ran past me,
Everyday
I see those colourful dresses,
bright red, orange and blue,
on the pavements,
a little after 8.

Buyers keep looking
to get the best
for the night,
measuring everything
without a measure.

They had a guest today
who joined them,
on their walk.
A wicked grin on one.
I saw her run.

The saree was risen
up to her knee
A sight of pleasure
for a vouyeur passing by.
The Pallu fell
like it does everyday.
But today they moved for
a different reason.

The man in Khakhi followed
trying to match the pace,
restrained,
by the bulging potbelly.
She ran past me.
His grin told it all.
She ran and ran.

The buyers looked.
It was entertainment,
as always.
The grin turned
into a laugh.

I kept looking
She ran past me
like a horse
and he followed
enjoying the chase.

independence day!

Just around the corner
I saw a young man,
Hungry, haggard.
Earning his daily bread
selling the shiny golden
badges and flags
"Jai hind" He cried
I looked at him
Patriotism fills tummies!!!

I went further
To see a jazzy showroom
decked up with lights
saffron, white and green
and there I saw the paper again
Saffron white and green
Decorating his window,
to be taken off
after a few days.
Thrown in some corner
of his godown
not bothered about
for exactly five months

I heard there was a party
My friends said " dry day,
We need to stock up"
I smiled and said enjoy
"whats the occasion?"
They proudly claimed
"60 Years of Independence "

Twenty Six

I stopped
to see someone
who looked like me

"Welcome" she said
and I looked at the pasture
behind her
The meadow was spread
wide and green
"Tempting" said I
And looked back
Nostalgia struck
and I refused to move

She burst into a giggle
and said
"what are you holding on to?,
Every year you try and I win"
I agreed and embraced
Twenty Six and more to come
With a smile and my head held high
I welcomed her into my life
and looked content
into the promising shades of green

Ootada Samaya

Bisi bisiyaada saaru
bisi bisiyaada anna
adare mele tuppa..
tuppada jote
ondishtu nage,ondishtu maatu..

Idu maneya
ootada samaya
Appa, Amma, Anna
yellara jote maataaduva samaya.

"Ondishtu anna badse"
"Amma neeru beku.."
"Anna nin tatte li saarigintha
tuppane teltha idyello"
"oye sumne oota maade
bari harte"

ee oota bari oota alve
maneyoru koodi jothey iruva
ondu nepa
Nenapina doni yali
eedu ondu nenapu

ootada samaya meeri hoytu.
oota madoru
samayadante baralilla
nagu maathu, aata
ondu nenapu
bari ondu sundara
Nenapu


A few thoughts in Kannada(I cant read or write kannada) this is my first attempt at expressing myself in Kannada

puppets of almighty's decision

Lost in the world of illusions,
Travelling through lanes of confusions,
Searching for a road to our destination,
Puppets of Almighty's decision.

Cross-roads and winding directions,
Ears hear suggestions,
Dilemma engulfs all resolutions,
Puppets of Almighty's decision.
Hatred spread by fake green leaves,
Hearts torn apart running behind these,
Happiness is not what will be achieved,
Sorrow is that which will increase.

Greed shining in their eyes,
Humanity murdered in bright daylight,
Innocence lost, withering mankind,
Guiding light nowhere in sight.
Born on the streets
A chubby healthy Kid
"Why couldnt she find another place to litter"
Mom took me from there
To protect me from them
Cruel world, Crazy Machines
All unhappy at my birth

Mom never got much bread
But fed me and Brother.
People wouldnt spare her
Even when she fed
Sticks ,stones and abuses
Hurled at her
She went on feeding us.

Humans they were
Superior beings said mom
But to me
Seemed so inferior
Mind, they had to think
Which they said I lacked
But yet they decided to hit me

Protests they called
Against violence against them
But none fought for me
A mute roadside animal
Not a precious human
Thats my identity
How mean this world can be
A photograph to see
and in that face,
an emotional bond.
Strangers yet
a connection.
Books of the past
opened for the other
to read.
Similarities bring
a smile
and yet a confusion
a fear, a doubt
of not 'hitting off'.
all feelings mutual
and mutual the fear too
fingers crossed
waiting for the day
when two strangers
meet...
reveal themselves
to each other.
and finger crossed
hope that every thing
just falls into place
For now
the moment
the present
the future 2 hours to come
the rain
the moonshine
the droplets
the pitter patter
the giggling kids
the lightning
the cool breeze
the smell of fresh wet mud
the smell of fresh air
the movement of the clouds
the whistle of a train
the sound of a motorbike
the chatter of women
the banging of the door
the barking of the dogs
the noise from the radio.
the laughter of men
the sound of music
the honk of a car
the silence of ones mind
the senses at work
Meetings scheduled
and re scheduled
and cancelled .
Fate wouldn't have it otherwise .
Incentives and ice creams ,
coffee and pizza .
Meetings scheduled,
and cancelled again ,
in this busy world
of tests and workload

Meeting rescheduled,
this time with a promise.
Come what may ,
rescheduling wont
happen again.
And here on a bright,
saturday afternoon,
I meet "the stranger"
i could identify with
even before I met him .

Silent was he in the
beginning .
Maybe it was the
first time silence
or maybe two girls
were too much
to handle .
But then came the
menu and the
what to eat?

The usual silence
and their struggle to
decide what to choose ,
brought a smile on my face
and then I noticed ,
his gentle eyes .
He wasnt looking,
but I smiled to myself .
Those eyes were innocent, loving
but not looking.

He caught me smiling
but didnt know why ,
and me and my coy self
wouldnt say why .
Smiles exchanged
laughter, food, challenges
An instant bond
the feeling mutual ,
but not expressed .
Silence did the talking.

Maybe the restaurant figured out
the feelings and forgot the orders .
The card swipes wouldnt work
and the three musketeers
were stuck in the restaurant .
Irritation and anger on his face
but whoosh it went soon.
God bless the restaurant
for making the first meeting
so memorable

Excitement, and fun
"Oh!!! you are sleeping are you?".. BOOOO.
I wasnt meant to be scared
but scared was I by the
man - made ghost.
Held his hand tight
And I knew I was safe
laughter followed .
Teased was I
for my shriek.

But smiles joined the fun
and the day was beautiful .
Roses, the girls brought and
gave it to him .
Surprised was he ,
but accepted it nonetheless
Parting time came close
and it was difficult.
Hugs given, Hair ruffled
Warmth felt

A bond established ,
A new feeling begins,
The feelings expressed,
We "hit off".
The fear vanished ,
smiles on our face ,
we went back home,
only to get back to
our dear old computer
to continue with what we started...
At times
gloom hits suddenly
The black clouds
have circled the sky.

A memory comes back.
The day remembered.
Ode to the lost childhood
written in silence

Fear strikes.
A poor animal
lying on the road
mirrors a self.

Tears flow inside
my eyes.
Shame stops them
from flowing out.

I have been hit
by the darkness
the clouds have
showered

I have been knocked
by the memory
which I tried hard to forget
I am wounded
Eyes communicating
what words failed to say.
The throat refused
to co-operate.
The mind wondered
if it was the right time
to say what the
heart felt.
The clash of the
heart and the mind.
But the eyes
give away
what the soul really
wanted to say.
Eyes couldnt lie
and there I caught them
admiring me.
The hot blazing sun
The long drive
To "the home"

Laughter and fun
Smiles galore
The noon lunch

More talk and
More laughter
Lives shared

A few silent moments
A few shy smiles
A few glances

The sun drowns
Bye s told
But the smiles remain

Anxious hearts await
For the next drive
To "the home"

Mumbai

A big bang
in the distant suburbs.
Metal splinters
pierce through
the skin,
Screams and yells.
Pain flashed
for the world to see
Tears, blood
and gore
For some
It was business
"We are the first"
and the most insensitive
For some,
Hearts bled
drops of hot tears
flowed like a river
Some rejoiced
drinking glassful
of yeasted drink
But still the city
sprung back
with a vengence
Smiles flashed
Peace prevailed
Hands joined together
to say
You can never defeat us
for we are strong
We face life head on
We never say die
Come what may
You wont win
Cause we are
The angels of peace


Mumbai: A place where I was born.The place which made me the person Iam,The place which taught me to appreciate life and live life to the fullest. The place which taught me to dream and also to achieve my dreams..

This poem dedicated to Majhi Mumbai. Tu nehmi ashich sundar raho, heech majhi iccha

The Wedding Bells

The union of
the bride and the groom.
A happy future
built in dreams
Preparations go on
in full swing

"Traditional is passe"
The new generation vows
to bring in a change
Nothing new, Nothing new
All's the same

The menu card comes
promising a huge bill.
Frowned faces,and cost cutting,
Faces invited, gifts purchased
An useless pleasing

The missing piece of
vegetable in the broth,
discussed in my absence
the diety not pleased
And God feeds on my poverty

Jingle Jingle
The wedding bells ring
Bring out the banjo
Dance and sing
and let my pockets
empty within
pitter patter
the raindrops fall
on my window sill
the sound of the rain
brings back the giggling
of angels and sunshine
on a lazy afternoon
In the cosy corner
gazing into eyes
the smiles of joy
the shared piece
of happiness.
smiles and more
laughter and joy
in the arms
of the one you love
Evening
Chaos
Words
Conflict
Distance
Longing
Night falls
Silence
Missing warmth
Mind searches
Comfort
Poetry gives
Respite
Salty, drops of water,
trickling down
the smooth surface
of skin.
Reasons not known
yet they trickle down.
the beating is low
and the mind restless.
Reason unknown
yet affected
by this unknown storm
And the child in me
runs through
the green green grass.
Feels the morning mist,
kiss my cheeks.
Laughter innocent
my friend.
Soul untouched ,
un- corrupt,
Pure...

HAPPY CHILDRENS DAY.
Tic Tock
chimes the clock.
Reminder of the
age old ritual
that I once
denied to acknowledge
A faint,
forgotten lore
rings in my ears.
Unknown,
a thought
visits,scars
my heart
And I once again
aghast, lone
try to fight
these tears
that remind me
of all that was
"forgotten"
A single
blade of grass,
standing tall
in the vast dry lands
drought hit
clouds decieve
parched ,
a drop falls...
thirst quenched?

Voicebox throttled

The voice box throttled
Gasp!!!!! choke!!!
The sound
doesnt reach.
The shouts
silenced.
The reasons
chanted.
The chants boom
louder and louder.
It spins
and dances
like the spirits
around the
scarred remains
of a mum doll.

Liberation!

My frustrations just increase
I, The liberated woman
but Am I?
I fear, I fear
of acid attacks
of those invisible threats
and my scars
short text messages
vowing eternal friendships
I ignore, I ignore
But does that stop?
No, For i cant refuse
how dare I refuse
I, dare not speak
of those slimy hands
tracing my contours
For who am I
but just a woman.
How can i fight?
Should I dare?
I dare, I dare
for my voice
cant be stifled.
I Roar.
My voice booms
the warning
should be heard
Dont turn deaf,
HEAR MY VOICE
YOU BETTER..
LISTEN

Ambition

Dreams .. Are they just mine alone?
Thoughts.. they arent just mine alone
My thoughts contain the other too
but does the other contain mine?

Are my dreams a thorn
in the others path.
Do I divert?
or should I follow?
For they are mine
Long nurtured
and hoped for.

Or do my dreams
need to change?

Time will tell

But what does
it choose to tell?

My dreams that change..

would they mean a smile on my face?
would they ensure a content heart?
or would they just compromise
and fool my heart?

Was this what
I had aspired for?
Is This how
the girls mind
should behave?

Are my dreams
what the other
should achieve?
Faint flickering lights.
The clock strikes midnight,
She stands
on the doorway,
Dressed to kill,
Waiting for
her man to come
Red bright colour
on her forced moist lips,
Unknown smiles returned
She greets, looks eagerly
Her eyes fixed
on the tingle of paper
in the pockets
The burning stomach
The spreading thighs
An invite to pleasure
written on the
grave of her-self.

The festival

The air smells divine,
Fragrant agarbatthis,
Loud crackers,
The cheer in the neighbourhood,
The banging of drums,
The dance of festive joy.
Devotees rejoice.
Through the small lanes,
the crowd spreads .
The sudden smell of burnt skin,
Remains of black charred rubber
The clanging of falling pots
The cries, the shrieks
Drums beat louder
The voice drowns,
Vows written in red ink.
The dance of death.
The diety looks on
Numb, Unmoving, Silent.
The gift
of soft melting chocolates.
The sweetness melts,
deep inside.
A certain chill,
an ecstasy,
the feeling ,
of highest fulfillment,
unexplainable ,
yet - present.
the longing
for that gift
before the distance
separates.
The message floats
through gestures,
to be deciphered.
But... would the
unspoken linear words
be heard?
In the midst
of the surrounding
cacophony of thoughts,
a desire expressed.
Time runs and
yet stands still
The words stop ,
Abrupt.
Till ... time and 'time'
decide to merge
into bliss.

Identity

The ratcheting boom spreads
like a disease
with no vaccine
It hurts, it breeds.
Questions unanswered
decay in the open
to be
scavenged in memory.
Don't look at me
like I don't belong
I am not a refugee
And this is my land.
Don't deny me
my identity.
My land.
My space.
Never never
are the pleas heard
for they opened up
the deep underground
to scar the skies in hazy gray.
Troubled by the truth
haunted by the thoughts
for centuries suppressed
now here to see..
Oh please oh please
I ain't your battle ground.
Bury it deep down
in the abyss of the bygone
deeper than the bones
that this soil buries....

Innovations & Metaphors

The bird flies high
takes my heart away
to the far off
cold beautiful land
where once the
terror ruled.
I sit in frontof a machine
typing out alphabets
that carry meanings
I wait for those signals
to sing the tone
and happily I pick
the box which
transports voices
across nations.
I can see faces
onthe screen,
smiling, laughing
,looking lovingly
into my eyes
conveying those words
unsaid, far away
where those cold
snow peaked mountains
reside.

The ride to heaven

On the fast lane
Vrooom!!!
The engine accelerates
The meter ticks
to the maximum
Adrenaline rush
Get the ‘kick’
Experience the high
A slow driver
passes by
laughter and ridicule
"who wears the helmet?
Old man!!!"
The wind blowing on
my silken hair
"Ohhh!!! I look damn hot!!"
A moment of pause
The tar turns red
The innards are splashed
on the road
The high hits the blue.
No more breath
No more pulse
No more no more
Eyes closed
the wayto heaven
I head.

Termination

Shapeless,
Unborn,
Unknown,
Anonymous piece of flesh
Unwanted,
Disposed,
Murdered,
Anonymous piece of flesh.
And I stared ,
at the people passing by.
the bright neon lights
staring at me....blank
like my mind.
Characters just moving ,
giving a glimpse of a part
of their vast experiences.
and I looked at them
wondered if they felt like i did.
did they know ?
Inside me a thought visited ,
put a question mark on my face.
It swimmed
through every part .
I could feel it moving
The muscles twitching
the woman in me
felt a twinge
of guilt
of sorrow
I tried to explain
but somewhere it said
why do u try ?
why should you ?
for sometimes
they are not required
No matter what
explanations wont satisfy .
they never would
Thoughts wont dissapear
with logical reasoning
they stay
fresh in your mind
only to hide somewhere
to resurface
when you least expect
them to rise
but the calm
hides the storm
the face lies.
the eyes look blank
as the passer by audience
too engrossed in their lives
moves alongside
staring with those blank eyes
Those words on the screen
Lighted up my evening
I probed, trying to find out
answers to my doubts
secretly hoping
that what I was to hear
was what I expected to hear
Anticipation, anxiety
my heart skipped a beat
smiled, overjoyed
It danced, but also
questioned its joys
hoped that things would
be fine, touch wood
( touched her own head)
A year later I look back
and have a content smile.
Thinking that I
cleared that milestone
of being together for 365 days
Days full of joy,
of happiness, arguements, fights
Love and more...
More is yet to come
And more is what I ask for.
This aint a poem
But just a flux of thoughts
running through and round
Poems are edited
to be consumed
and my thoughts
flow free on this blank sheet
to be sent to the one
far away from my eyes at present
but always a part of
every single moment of my life
and would be for the rest of my life.


Happy anniversary to us.. :)

For all puppies and doggies..

The little yelps
Eyes unopened
Sniffing the scent
of milk
"Mommy....."
They cried

A human stood
looking at them
Brown and Black..
Yellow and White
Smelling of their own poo.
Suckling on my fingers
Dirty little babies!!!

"Salty milk?"
"this aint milk"
The smart one declared
" This aint mommy either"
Yelp Yelp!! Little bow wows
They crawled away from me

"Putti...!!!,
Here are your babies
Covered with poo"
Mommy looked
"come come come,
My hungry puppies"

The babies slept
suckling on
mommies breast
Putti smiled,

Ah!! such are the joys of motherhood


This poem is for the 5 new born pups and their mom Putti, who has been living in our locality since God knows when. And yup, I cleaned the puppies and washed my hands too. He he he.

Monday, August 20, 2007

A broken twig
bandaged
In the hope
that it will grow
I water the plant
carefully
keeping every thorn
away
hurting my hand
in the process
but the distant
picture
of the long tree
with branches
lush green
makes me
dream......................
.and I dream
hoping I dont wake up
from my slumber
and If i do
would I see
a reality
as pleasant as my dreams
I write a poem
not intending ofcourse
to write one
but I write
to help hold back
the salty waters
which overflow
no gulp
stops
the flood
and nothing
can control..

Colours
I wish to see
colours
spread out
never fading

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Learning to Live

Tagged .
Burnt.
tears.
salty disguise.
memories
No!!!!!
Nightmares.
Past.
Haunt.
Yardsticks.
A long winding road
An escape
A closed pathway
A ray of dark hope
Legs tired
Thorny paths
Hope, expectations
More and more
Drowning voices
Stifled cries
A full stop.
A comma,
Maybe a semicolon;
what punctuations ???
Choice????
Choose this
choose that,
marketing gimick
Business of life
Politics
Learning the tricks
Still learning.
Blank,
A Void,
a deep sea
and a few corals
a filter
and a sponge
squeezed out on earth
the sun hit hard
dry,Slowly crawled
the snail
back to the sea,
and with it
came thecoral
feeding and filtering
back to the
same routine
the familiar path
welcomes
with warmth

( To be edited later.)

Saturday, July 14, 2007

Clot

A crust
of dried blood,
Dust mixed.
A rusted knife,
Wounding
the skin.
The liquid
gushes out again
Clot formed
Un-healed
For the knife strikes....
Again..